In my last post, I stated that one of the most powerful ways to block access to inner guidance is by adhering to a too-rigid idea of what ‘counts’ as intuition. Obviously, I learned this the hard way. Another surefire way to turn our backs on intuition is by resisting the messages we do receive… or by fearing those that we might receive. As Lauren Aletta of Inner Hue states:
“When we deny our intuitive insight and guidance we are weakening our entire being. We are also actively distrusting ourselves. This begins to create “walls” between ourselves and our higher guidance, blocking further supportive information and insight.” —Lauren Aletta, Soul School Monthly (February 2015– p. 5), my emphasis added
Um… I have also learned this the hard way.
Etched on my soul somewhere is a figurative radio dial. Let’s pretend that I can turn this dial and consciously tune into whichever energetic station I choose. Let’s also imagine that The Intuition Station is at the far end of the frequencies, meaning I have to turn my dial through a whole lot of other stations before I can reach my preferred, clear and clairvoyant channel.
For many reasons and countless years, in spite of my best intentions, I couldn’t bring myself to turn that dial all the way. Instead, I stayed stuck on the Static, Confusion, and Resistance channels, publicly bemoaning how horrible it was (the noise!), but secretly fearing what might be in store for me if I ever mustered enough courage to tune in fully to my Intuition.
Like many people, I was decidedly scared of what my Intuition might say to me or ‘tell me to do’.
What if it made me shirk all of my worldly possessions (not to mention my beloved husband) and live a life of chastity and monastic poverty? That would be terrible! What if I needed to become a university professor and, for inexplicable reasons, conduct research experiments involving fruit flies and standard deviations? Oh, the horrors! What if my Intuition told me (gulp) to move back to Calgary, Alberta? Ack– I couldn’t handle that! And so– all joking aside– fear kept my radio dial firmly in place, blocking me from receiving my intuitive guidance for decades…
I finally resolved to face my Intuition with bravery– ‘finally’ as in ‘just this January’– choosing to trust that it operates only for my benefit and highest good, nuns and fruit flies notwithstanding. It helped that I had already selected Trust as my word of the year, because I started to ask myself with curiosity, How can I attune myself to the frequency of ‘Trust’? How can I align my actions and my very cells with ‘Trusting’? Part of what came to me through this exploration was the idea of inviting my intuition back in and taking small, resonant actions on the inner guidance I received.
I certainly didn’t want to perpetuate a state of active distrust within myself or to continue rejecting my intuition with force, so I took a deep breath, found some stillness within my heart, and told my Intuition:
After years of putting up a shield in misguided defense against my intuition, clairvoyant insights didn’t suddenly flood in to my consciousness with a Whooosh! (I might need a little warming up, too, if I was your friend Intuition and I hadn’t been confided in, consulted, or actually listened to for years.) Hazy sensations started to come through relatively quickly, though, and I resolved to heed them as best I could.
One of the biggest nudges I received was to start writing on my blog again. (Also: Consistently.) I was coaxed to ‘pick a topic’ and– after some melodramatic, full-body resistance on my part– I settled on the one theme that actually frightened me the most: conscious weight loss. (Honestly, venturing to write about weight at all represented a gigantic leap of faith on my part, let alone positioning myself as someone who had anything of value to offer in that regard. But I did it, and based on the feedback I’ve received so far, I’ve realized that ‘hey! I can actually be supportive and helpful to women on this path. Who knew?’)
Intuition isn’t static energy, though.
One of the steepest learning curves I’ve encountered on this budding intuitive journey of mine is the need to stay open and flexible to course corrections along the way.
I’m not going to lie: this has not been easy for me. Academically Trained Me is accustomed to setting goals, making plans, and then sticking to the program, come hell or high water. Changing course, to Academic Me, has a bitter flavor to it– a subtle undercurrent of ‘failure’ or ‘being incorrect’, both of which conditions Academic Me fears and abhors.
The true challenge on this path to intuition has been trusting: fiercely, earnestly, and continually. (Go figure, right? I must have intuitively selected Trust as my word of the year after all…) Many of the intuitive nudges I receive either don’t seem to make (logical) sense or they actively fly in the face of conventional wisdom… or both. But I am staying open and being flexible in my approach. (Trying to, at least!)
- having the courage to open my intuitive channels, even if I am apprehensive about the guidance I might receive
- trusting! (myself, the universe, the process, everything.)
- committing to honoring the messages I receive from my inner guidance, even those (and perhaps especially those) that don’t seem to make ‘sense’ on a logical level
- taking small, aligned actions in the direction of my guidance
- being willing to course-correct as needed
How about you? What does intuition look like for you, and how do you honor and follow your inner guidance?
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